I love the book
"He's Just Not That Into You," by
Greg Behrendt and
Liz Tuccillo (the movie just didn't do it justice.) It provides a no-nonsense, realistic approach to dating and relationships. In re-reading parts of the book recently, I realized that certain key points of the book could also be applied to the employer/applicant relationship. With job hunting (as with dating) many hours are often spent waiting by the phone, obsessing over that job interview (or date). Why haven't they called? Should I call them? What does it mean? Should I just move on?
"Don't waste the pretty!" The book's authors advise (or in the case of a job seeker, don't waste the talent.) Pretty frank advice, but true. Consider several of their main points and how they relate to the applicant experience:
1. He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Calling You.
Also true with employers. They received your resume, trust me. It could be that you don't have the qualifications they're seeking. Maybe the company has received a million resumes and are still sorting through them. Maybe they already have someone lined up for the job. But if you don't receive a call for an interview relatively soon after submitting your resume, it's a pretty clear message: the company just isn't that into you.
3. He's Just Not That Into You If He Doesn't Want to Marry You.
You've jumped through multiple hoops - the phone interview, several in-person interviews - and the feedback has been all positive! And yet....no job offer. It went to another candidate instead. This can really sting, especially when all of your talents, work experience and values seemed to align perfectly with the company you're interviewing with. The reasons for not landing a job offer vary, but the bottom line is, the organization just wasn't into you enough to offer you the position.
4. He's Just Not That Into You If He's Breaking Up With You.
Whether you aren't selected for an interview, or ultimately not chosen for a position, most companies will call or email you a polite "thanks but no thanks" notice. This is not the time to call the recruiter and "re-emphasize" all of your best qualities, or send back a terse reply, indicating your disapproval with their decision. Rejections are really, really hard, and it's natural to want to respond. But just like with dating, you cannot cajole your way out of a rejection, and you cannot change someone's mind. Accept the decision and move on. Be classy. There
is a company out there that really wants to hire you.
5. He's Just Not That Into You If He's Disappeared On You.
You aced the phone interview and several in-person interviews. The company's recruiter said he would get back to you. And then.....nothing. No phone call, no email - not even a smoke signal. While
I don't agree with not following up with applicants regarding their status, some companies do just that. You could follow up with a call of your own, but the message is still clear. As the authors state, "No answer is your answer." Don't ask yourself what you did wrong, or how you could have done it differently. Next time you go for an interview that went smashingly well, and then never hear back from the recruiter, consider the thought that the company just might not be that into you. And then free yourself to go find the company that is!
You can't control whether or not a company calls you back, or even calls at all. What you can most quickly rectify is how long you stick around once you know that the company is just not that into you. It's not bad news if it helps you free yourself to find a better opportunity. As the book's authors remind us, "knowledge is power...more importantly, knowledge saves us time."